The dreaded Veluitis

The thorntree is a great place to hang out for someone who likes to travel. Or anybody who doesn't like to like to travel & yet still has to. I had also posted the "urinating Norms in India" thread In the Indian Sub Branch. Some of the replies to it were most entertaining. I am not very sure how long the Mods on that branch will allow it to float on the TT waters, so let me run by a few of them here.Till then please see the thread on its original site:

Terry recounted how he had suffered directly due to the horrible bacteria:-

Horrible side effect: The damn Indian bacteria (veluitis) made my package huge, but shrunk my bladder to the size of a peanut.

Result: I'm hung like a porn star, but have to go to the bathroom every 3 minutes.


Personal allegations were heaped in my directions for raising the deadly Veluitis:

Balthasar:

...Velu has been one of the leading oracles on this branch for many years, ever since he got honourable discharge from the merchant navy in 2003, when he (not to his fault, I haste to add) contracted an unpleasant disease in Shanghai at Maison Pouce.

Velu has set his heart and mind to all things medical, and will answer any question regarding health and hygiene in India...

...Veluitis however is far more serious, since it is bacterial and as far as we know there's no antibiotics available at this moment to cure it, so pay heed to OP's warning, otherwise you'll end up hung like poor Terry...

LAwoman: ...Velu, you must have picked up the bacteria from that strip joint you visited in Texas, so much for cheap lap dances...



There were alternate veluitis avoidence methods as well.

Ashique : ...This problem as far as I understand was addressed long back. According to a UN health report, mostly men urinate on the street walls standing and they were advised to carry a scissors, and occassionally cut the urine stream. So every few seconds, the connectivity is lost and the bacteria falls back on the ground...

But this was rapidly dismissed by Tonya001 :

...A recent report, published and peer-reviewed, pointed out that the scissors method to cut the flow was an urban myth and noted that the real way to stop the bacteria was to pee upwards in short bursts making an arc - but ensure that ye stop each short burst before other end of arc reaches the ground. Alternatively, if ye have forskin, pinch this very tightly as ye pee...

Ofcourse not everyone believed in Veluitis. These people have not been heard of since. I hope they have not fallen prey.

SlimesA: ...This is a joke right? Or perhaps we're witnessing the birth of a new urban myth.

Bacteria can "swim", but oh so slowly - about 5 minutes for 1 mm according to the first link below. The idea that one can swim up a stream of piss is just laughable. And waiting to pounce?!..

Sky Princess: ...I thought they were little bugs but everyone says bacteria because they were so small. So which is it? Like simesA says bacteria actually can't travel that fast, but bugs can. Please use appropriate terminology so as not to confuse people!...


Some of the other great method of Veluits avoidance were listed as well:

Gengis : ...or you can piss thru a one way filter and eliminate the upward travel of the bugs...

CoqitoErgoSum: ...Most people just drink a bottle of antibacterial mouthwash in the morning. That way the bacteria die on contact.

Just make sure you don't use whitening mouthwash - the missus might not like the colour mismatch. ...

Uli qlueck: ...Are there no pissing purification filter, maybe from kathadyn or some well known brands.
For the light packed travelers maybe purification tabletts which you can take an hour before your business?...

Hardbubble: ...My technique is to run backwards as fast as possible, while urinating.

Run forward for pooping.

If pooping and peeing, sit in a swing alternating streams of pee and poop as you rock back and forth. Long steady arcs work best as you will be clenching/releasing just a little less often. I recommend practicing at a childrens playground before heading to India....


Such talent. Sigh! Piss safe friends!!